santa stopped by

and these are some of the things he dropped off!

Getting ready

Even though the flowers still look pretty (although not as nice as this picture conveys - we've had frost every morning this week and they're starting to look quite floppy)...I'm slowly getting into a holiday frame of mind. I've got a zillion things to make/get/cook/bake for the season and I'm just getting going now.
Here's a preliminary list:
6 aprons
Many dozens of cookies
6 scarves
4 coin purses

Of course, as the magazines start to arrive my brain will overload with additional projects and crafts I hope to create, and then the list will grow. But this is enough to get me started, don't you agree?

Finding Fall

I am tired...and of few words tonight. So, some pictures

things I love: water

I took my boys to a lake not far from our home last week. It was quiet and tranquil with only a few other moms and their kids there that day.

My little ones were really kind to one another (mostly) and I enjoyed watching them play together, and muse about how their fraternal bonds will change over the years. It made me miss my sister, whom I haven't seen for a couple weeks.

Especially with all the craziness and stress of our chosen hectic life, it was especially important to have a day with my kids spent enjoying the beautiful Earth we've been given...and the beautiful family we've been blessed with as well.

On the upswing

Things are improving over here...the weather has really been amazing, and we've been outdoors most of the time. Our schedule is fairly hectic the next few weeks, because I have quite a lot of clinic hours to do for school. This will take place pretty much every weekend until mid-September. It is hard work, but very gratifying. But the time spent with the boys has been wonderful, and today was no exception! Lots of laughter and happiness. R. told me the other night at bedtime "I miss you when you at school mama.". Oh baby, I miss you too.

have you seen this baby?

See, this is my older son, R...and he doesn't look like this anymore. Nor does he act quite like this anymore either. R. and I are deep in a power struggle these past few weeks, and my love and I aren't really sure how to get out of it. Every request, it seems, is met with defiance. His little brother is often at the receiving end of his frustration. Toys are thrown, voices yell, doors slam - and overall, it's not been a happy place to be.

This is not to say that we have not a happy home. Throughout the day, we read books, sing songs, exchange hugs and kisses, and more. This is why I've been feeling so confused. At times, I really feel like I've got the supermom act down - I try to provide a lot of opportunities for creative expression and open ended play. So this unacceptable behavior (and I say that phrase, OVER and OVER each day lately) is really, shall we say, ticking me off. M too. It's embarassing, even more so when it's in public. And boy, is it wearing me out.

Manners and discipline are very important to M. and I. We don't run a military school here or anything, but I like the way "Yes, ma'am" sounds. I also like it when children thank their elders and refer to them by last names. These are antiquated formalities, I know - but I think that they evoke a feeling of respect and gentility. I still refer to my elders as Mr. and Mrs. So and So, and I think I always will.

So, any tips to share on getting through this phase (and I do hope it's just that)? Or am I destined to be raising an unappreciative preschooler who will grow in to an unappreciative adult?

Beth's Blessingway

Today was a blessingway circle for my dear friend Beth. She is expecting her third child in a few short weeks, and this beautiful gathering of women was a powerful experience. This will be her first homebirth. I had never participated in a blessingway before, and was honored and emotional throughout. The journey of mothering is such a personal path, yet this special ceremony connected each of the women in the circle, as well as reminded us of our connection to our own maternal lineages and that of our ancestors throughout time.

During the ceremony, we adorned Beth's belly with Henna and created a birth necklace for her to wear during her labor. Each woman contributed a bead and shared a piece of wisdom as she strung it on the necklace. There were other special elements, each with its own power. It was a beautiful experience and one that I hope to share again in the future. Isn't it a gift to be a mother...what a blessing!